And enjoy my rather large beer, while my male cohorts are out enjoying their annual weekly gathering which consists of beer, copious amounts of marijuana, and usual routine of taking turns on Battlefield 3. I’ve come to a conclusion, one in which I have subconsciously been aware of for quite some time, just never quite wanted to accept it, It is clear to me now that my only two options in Life are to A: Live my life alone and die in such a manner, or B: settle for some dimwitted girl who can’t carry on a conversation to save her life, yet has rather large breast and the sexual appetite of spider monkeys (Is that a good analogy?) because lets face it, all the smart beautiful girls I like are smart enough to know that they can do better than me, and even If I were to some how magically woo a beautiful smart woman into having the slightest remote feelings for me, I highly doubt that I would be able to reciprocate such feelings, something inside of me just feels unhinged, broken, not as it once was, I do not believe I any longer have the capacity to feel such affections for a woman, sadly I feel I have become the common “deuchebag” that all women perceive men to be, I only want sex, which troubles me greatly, I’ve fallen very much for the lad I once was, I may have been far too sensitive, but at least I cared about others feelings, now I’m just a lonely, bitter, old man who can’t seem to let go of the past. How terribly cliche.

Feeling like the bad guy, I’m tired of being taken for granted, talked down to, or ignored. I’m starting to think that even my best friends are just “conditional friends” yeah when they want something, or need someone, or just lonely yeah Jerry’s the guy to go to, but fuck his feelings, he doesn’t matter. I’m just so sick of the fake friends I always seem to have, days like these I just wish I had a genetic cloning friend maker machine, but knowing me I would probably just end up using it to make a dozen Kaley Cuoco sex slaves. :/